Psychoanalyzing Literature
by the Chronic Meltdown
Summary: AU. "You don't know what's wrong with you." she said in a heated whisper. "You don't know what's wrong with you, and so you try to find the answer in the minds of other people." NanoFate, AliciaHayate


_**Psychoanalyzing Literature**_

Or,

**The Study of a Difficult Persona**

"Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask,  
and he will tell you the truth."  
-Oscar Wilde

"…_a horrifying end for a supposedly innocent person. _

_It's strangely amusing, when everything in her life has somehow managed to take a turn for the worse. It's expected, now. _

_If something doesn't go wrong, she's almost… disappointed._

_But that's just the way she sees things. It isn't really something etched in stone, engraved, and in all ways permanent. It's simply an opinion. Intangible. Fluctuating. _

_It's just the way she sees things._

_She's nineteen, then. She's nineteen when she dies. It's funny, now. She finds it funny. _

_And maybe that's what matters, in the end. Maybe that's what makes her a terrible person._

_The fact that she finds amusement in knowing that in an unfair life, she was one of the unlucky ones."_

Her voice carried even after the end of her speech. Blue eyes were beautiful. They were dark with a strange sort of pain, with something that was almost tangible to the rest of them, but they weren't there to mention it.

They weren't there to delve into the mind of Takamachi Nanoha.

That's why Fate found it funny that none of them could find it in themselves to break the silence.

"That was…" The literature professor struggled, trying to find a way to describe how the girl's speech made him feel. "…very…interesting, Takamachi-san."

Fate Testarossa decided it was time to break the silence amongst her peers. She leaned back in her seat and tapped the desk with her pen. The nineteen year old standing at the front of the room raised an eyebrow in a gesture the burgundy eyed girl could only describe as 'politely interested'. It almost made her smile.

"Personally," she began, while twirling a particular strand of her own hair around her finger, "I thought it was a frighteningly self-destructive reflection of your own hopes and desires."

The nineteen year old blinked at this in rapid succession. She then smiled, somewhat peculiarly, and in a delightfully wry tone, said what was on her mind.

"And what, exactly, is your basis for drawing that conclusion?"

Fate couldn't resist smiling at her. She was barely aware of how several other people about the room dropped their pens and pencils. She did, however, fully notice the fact that Nanoha grimaced at them, and it made her smile even more widely.

"At first it was simply the way you spoke of the character, as though you were describing an old friend." She shifted in her seat, slightly, and leaned forward on the palm of her hand. Blue eyes followed her every movement. "Then, as the story progressed, your inflection changed. As you delved deeper into your character's thoughts and emotions, it began to seem as though you held a more personal interest than what you probably should have. Not to mention the fact that you expressed an almost unnatural familiarity with the character's friends and family…by which point, I will respectfully assume they are also based on real people as well."

She smiled, or smirked, really, at Nanoha's ever-encroaching flush.

"Of course, this is simply the humble opinion of a young psychology student. Please take what I have said as a grain of salt."

She gathered her things and walked down to the front of the class. She smiled at the professor, gleefully noting that the brown haired child was still standing in the middle of the room, almost glaring at her. Ah, how she enjoyed rattling the girl's nerves.

"Thank you for letting me listen to your lecture." She said charmingly, and the man dropped his guard immediately, in an almost despairingly desperate way. "It was very interesting."

"Of course, Testarossa-san." He said, with a small spark within his eyes that made Fate squirm inwardly. "You're welcome here any time."

Someone coughed in the back row.

She turned around and smirked at her twin sister, who was busy pretending to blow her nose. Her other half then stopped and grinned at her, and it was perfectly clear that she understood exactly what Fate was trying to achieve with her visit.

The youngest twin simply smiled and turned back to the nineteen year old girl that was the unknowing object of her affections.

"Excuse me, Takamachi-san." She said softly, and bypassed her in order to get to the exit.

She twisted the doorknob and pushed through.

Of course, she didn't really expect for someone to follow her. _Especially_ not Takamachi Nanoha.

"Those that try to understand other people's actions and thoughts-" The brown haired girl cut herself off, abruptly, before starting again with something in her eyes that Fate did not dare label. "Those that try to psychoanalyze other people are the most twisted ones of all." She hissed, and Fate took half a step back, aware that they were still in the line of sight of the students inside the classroom.

And Nanoha was furious. Fate could feel it, now. She stopped herself before she could commence analyzing the emotion, because it was exactly what had gotten her into trouble earlier.

"Oh, really?" She replied, asking in the impossibly charismatic way she knew bothered the other girl the most. "And what, exactly, is your basis for that conclusion?"

Fate smiled, not quite mockingly, but in a way that conveyed nothing but pure amusement. Truthfully, she wasn't amused at all.

Nanoha took a step forward and rammed her palms flat against the wall on either side of her. And it was the closest they had ever been, Fate noted dully. She had hoped for better circumstances, but it would have to do, for now.

"You don't know what's wrong with you." She said in a heated whisper. The blonde froze in place, no longer trying to come up with a witty remark. And Nanoha's words all came out in a rush. "You don't know what's wrong with you, and so you try to find the answer in the minds of other people."

It felt as though she'd been slapped. Punched in the gut.

As though she had fallen out of a tree and landed on her back. Breathless in a not-so-pleasant way.

So for a moment, she was entirely silent. She struggled to focus on the other's face, on maintaining the same expression she always presented to the world. A sad mask. She'd always worn a sad mask, hadn't she?

So where was it now?

And even if she had been able to come up with a suitable explanation for her silence, even if she had managed to rationalize why her facial expression had crumbled momentarily, she was certain that Takamachi Nanoha would not have been fooled.

Not for a second.

The girl was very perceptive, after all.

She would have made for a brilliant psychologist.

~o~** Harmony**

_We lack it. _~o~

The Testarossa twins were the university's eighth wonder. It really rubbed Hayate the wrong way.

"How is it possible that they're both gorgeous, popular, and the best at everything they do?" She wondered aloud, crossing her legs and leaning back against the bench her friends had all proclaimed hers. "If we're following the unspoken laws of college and other educational institutions, one of them should be tall, dark, and angsty while the other should be the pretty, popular, stuck-up bitch with a surprising amount of brain dedicated to lascivious or devious behavior. At least that way they'd somehow _fit in_."

She paused. "Well, Fate-san's got that tall and angsty thing down…and idiot Ali-chin's got the whole lascivious and devious act perfected…but they're both charming, and neither of them is stuck-up. They're both pretty nice." She frowned. "That's not supposed to be plausible."

Her best friend since birth, who was sitting on the floor in front of her playing cards with the rest of their friends, glanced at her from over her shoulder.

"Maybe," The blonde conceded slowly, "But perhaps we should simply be grateful they a_re_, instead of worrying about it."

Chrono grinned from his position beside Carim. "Personally, I think we should be happy they're hot and not harming anyone."

Yuuno rolled his eyes as he made his play. "Of course that'd be your opinion." He peered at the twenty-one year old from over his glasses. "It makes me wonder why Amy-san bothers dating you."

Chrono scowled, yet still managed to look somewhat smug. "It must be my amazing charm." He said dryly, and made his move. Seeing that Carim was still lost in thought, he nudged her lightly. "It's your turn."

Hayate grinned as the blonde blinked and hastily put down a card.

"Sorry." She apologized, "I was just wondering…Do any of you know where Nanoha-chan is? I wanted to ask her something."

Suzuka, who was reading a book while leaning against Arisa, looked up at them.

"I believe she said she was going to the library."

Arisa clicked her tongue in agreement. "She had an essay to work on." She suddenly grinned and slapped the deck. Everyone winced at the missed chance. She smirked. "You snooze, you lose."

Chrono scowled. "Bah. I'll be paying attention, next time."

Carim laughed softly. "All of us will."

Hayate nearly snorted. "Well, I'm gonna go get Nanoha-chan for you, Carim-chan." She slid out of her seat and stretched before flicking the blonde's head and stepping forward. "See you later, peeps."

And she would have made her way to the library in peace, except for the fact that as soon as she rounded the corner, she stumbled into Alicia Testarossa.

The girl's amused burgundy eyes did that weird sparkly thing they'd always done since they were children. Hayate twitched in silent irritation.

"Hey, there." The girl hummed pleasantly, and her hand moved to push a strand of the brown haired girl's hair behind her ear. "How are you, Yagami-san?"

Yagami Hayate had the sudden urge to scream at the girl in Italian. She didn't, of course, but it was rather tempting. It was about the only thing that made Alicia Testarossa scowl.

"I'm fine. Now go away." She responded curtly, and tried to move past her.

"You _wound_ me, Yagami-san." If anything, Testarossa's smile had gotten even wider. She nearly jumped at the sensation of a hand brushing against her hip. "I'm only trying to be nice."

And Hayate absolutely hated herself for nearly shivering. "Well, then, go be nice over there. In fact," she suddenly said, "I see a fan girl right now!" She grinned mockingly and nudged the girl aside. "So why don't you two go ahead and be nice to each other in that empty classroom?"

Alicia smirked flirtatiously. "But I'd much rather be nice to you."

She laughed sarcastically as she began to walk towards the library. "Well, that's nice, but I'm needed elsewhere."

"And where might that be?" The blonde asked, apparently deciding to follow her around.

Ugh. There was nothing more annoying than having Alicia Testarossa follow her around like a golden retriever.

…Hayate suddenly grinned to herself.

"Hah."

"…" Alicia frowned, a bit confused. "Er…Hayate-chan?"

The blue eyed girl immediately scowled. "Don't call me that!"

"Yeah, you're alright." The nineteen year old smiled somewhat fondly. "Well, whatever. Have fun with Nanoha-san."

Hayate paused. "How did you-…?" She trailed off with a raised eyebrow before shaking her head and giving the girl a sheepish wave. "Never mind."

As she continued on her way, it suddenly occurred to her that she had forgotten to mention the fact that at least one of the Testarossa twins was fundamentally flawed. Of course, most twins shared that characteristic, so…But that was all pure speculation done by other people. It wasn't like _she_ spent time thinking about it or anything along those lines.

"Fundamentally flawed…" She sighed and frowned to herself. "That's such a stupid and annoying way to say they're gay."

Hayate was pretty much convinced that if they had been any other people, they'd have been shunned just like all the others that had come out before them. Then again, Fate Testarossa wasn't really _considered_ gay, because she hadn't openly admitted it.

Alicia was a different story. Yagami Hayate was very much aware of this because she'd been the one the girl had shoved up against a wall and groped very much against her will.

Well. _Sort of_ against her will.

**A/N: **I seriously have no idea whether or not I want to continue this. I'd like to hear your thoughts on it, though. Anyway.

This is very much dedicated to Fay. Specifically the scene with Fate and Nanoha.

Later.


End file.
